shy about intimacy

graceshinee · #1 17-07-2015, 07:43 AM

Hello=)

Anyone can share advice regarding shyness towards intimacy?
I came from a gal sch, so had a bf only in university.
My bf and i and i been together for close to 9 months.
Recently, my bf have the intention to to make out with me. But he notice me is very shy and uncomfortable with it=(
I am actually a extrovert by nature, takes part in alot activites ranging from school:nus cheerleading, to outside school:spca volunterering.
But i do not understand why i become very shy and awkward when comes to intimacy with my loved ones.
I am really afraid this would affect our relationship together.
I appreciate if anyone can advise,
Thanks=)

the_e_ones · #2 17-07-2015, 12:12 PM

Sis graceshinee, take one step at a time... be comfortable, feel it and enjoy it.

I'm sure you will be asking for more intimacy in no time...

P.S. we only live once...

almera · #3 17-07-2015, 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by graceshinee

Hello=)

Anyone can share advice regarding shyness towards intimacy?
I came from a gal sch, so had a bf only in university.
My bf and i and i been together for close to 9 months.
Recently, my bf have the intention to to make out with me. But he notice me is very shy and uncomfortable with it=(
I am actually a extrovert by nature, takes part in alot activites ranging from school:nus cheerleading, to outside school:spca volunterering.
But i do not understand why i become very shy and awkward when comes to intimacy with my loved ones.
I am really afraid this would affect our relationship together.
I appreciate if anyone can advise,
Thanks=)

If you are ready to make out with him, probably arrange for a good dinner, have a little alcoholic drinks to ease the feeling, look for a clean/ private place (your room/ his room) .. switch off the light or with dim light ..

WVranger · #4 17-07-2015, 01:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by graceshinee

Hello=)

Anyone can share advice regarding shyness towards intimacy?
I came from a gal sch, so had a bf only in university.
My bf and i and i been together for close to 9 months.
Recently, my bf have the intention to to make out with me. But he notice me is very shy and uncomfortable with it=(
I am actually a extrovert by nature, takes part in alot activites ranging from school:nus cheerleading, to outside school:spca volunterering.
But i do not understand why i become very shy and awkward when comes to intimacy with my loved ones.
I am really afraid this would affect our relationship together.
I appreciate if anyone can advise,
Thanks=)

Watch more love show, especially those R rated ones, you will slowly act what you watched. Most of all you got to be relax, tensed up will create phobia towards intimacy.

Ps. Not asking you to watch SM movie and act like it, you will RUN!!!

velenma · #5 17-07-2015, 01:24 PM

Start with proper state of mind

Think of intimacy as an act of love, not lust

Tell urself this is the beginning of a wonderful relationship between both of u

Relax, take a deep breath

Think about things that u will do together

Set some milestones

Kissing
Deep french kiss
Petting
Heavy petting
Semi naked
Naked
Massage
Erotic massage
Oral sex
Non penetrative orgasm
Semi penetration
Full penetration

From the 12 milestones above, u may want to try one per month, but as things pick up, the progress would be exponential

Ur bf has to be like a sushi chef, and not a butcher

To be continued

FltPartner · #6 17-07-2015, 02:02 PM

There is a first for everything

conquer · #7 17-07-2015, 02:08 PM

Think about making more population for our beloved Singapore.

Spread your legs and Majulah Singapura!

Blackenrose · #8 17-07-2015, 02:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by graceshinee

Hello=)

Anyone can share advice regarding shyness towards intimacy?
I came from a gal sch, so had a bf only in university.
My bf and i and i been together for close to 9 months.
Recently, my bf have the intention to to make out with me. But he notice me is very shy and uncomfortable with it=(
I am actually a extrovert by nature, takes part in alot activites ranging from school:nus cheerleading, to outside school:spca volunterering.
But i do not understand why i become very shy and awkward when comes to intimacy with my loved ones.
I am really afraid this would affect our relationship together.
I appreciate if anyone can advise,
Thanks=)

Hi sister,
yes.. I think it will affect your relationship if u continue to be shy.. So..take the first step, give it a go. U will love it.

bloggert · #9 17-07-2015, 02:37 PM

It is normal to be shy about intimacy and you have nothing to be apologetic about. Intimacy is about allowing someone into an area of your life that is very private and precious. Naturally, you would not just be shy, but cautious about who you let into your secret garden.

Some reasons why a person might feel "shy" or uncertain could be:-

1. You're not totally sure about that person - you may like him but you may not trust him enough yet to let him into your secret garden.

2. You are worried that he may not like your garden after you let him in. This has to do with your self-esteem. It could be that you're not confident of yourself, or you're not sure how to handle the situation and things might get awkward and you end up embarrassing yourself. Do you trust him to accept you unconditionally?

3. Girls have more to lose than guys when it comes to intimacy. Naturally girls are more cautious about it than guys. The guy should know how to win your trust.

4. It is easier for guys to treat sex as sex, and far more difficult for girls to just enjoy sexual intimacy without considering wider concerns - such as the future of the relationship, romance, potential risks, etc.

All that is to say that there is nothing wrong with being shy, especially if it is your first time and you're inexperienced. As others have suggested - take it at a pace that you are comfortable with and don't be pressured into anything that you might later regret. Give when you are comfortable and ready to give. You're probably still young and if the guy is so eager for intimacy that he would leave you on that account, frankly, he's not worth it.

Aside from that, you should also educate yourself - learn up about your own body and sexuality. Read about the experiences of others. Contrary to what was suggested - porn is rather unlike reality so take all that with a pinch of salt. You might even want to talk to your bf about this. That has the added value of understanding how he sees it all.