Eligible but always rejected.

[Maxdom]

Sigh! I think u belong to the dull and uninteresting category. If there is any indication, I guess the way you communicate with them is more or less similar to the way you write. So many choice of words you can use but you choose so many big words to describe something or someone. That means you are not very smart. I think Paris Hilton probably wont date you.

But to transform people like you will not be overnight. I suggest you go watch the first movie scene (4 minutes) of "The social network" and see whether you can catch some glimpse of youself in there. Will you fuck him ?

[Aesthetic]

Originally Posted by HCKing

first and foremost what type of girls r u after? chio babe with big boobs? clubbing animals?

I happened to date only average Jane but with lack of success.

[Aesthetic]

Originally Posted by Maxdom

Sigh! I think u belong to the dull and uninteresting category. If there is any indication, I guess the way you communicate with them is more or less similar to the way you write. So many choice of words you can use but you choose so many big words to describe something or someone. That means you are not very smart. I think Paris Hilton probably wont date you.

But to transform people like you will not be overnight. I suggest you go watch the first movie scene (4 minutes) of "The social network" and see whether you can catch some glimpse of youself in there. Will you fuck him ?

Relative to the dating scene, yes, perhaps so. Your argument that I tend to use big words is not a valid one; technical one perhaps, but the nature of the words we deployed is often reflected in our percept of the world.

Anyway, get serious. I'm looking for concrete suggestions.

[indexes401]

Hi TS,

There is no right or wrong as everybody's experience is different. You can take my opinion as a reference point.

In the initial stage of courting, Girls usually love guys who can joke and make them laugh.

You got to let lose and try to make the girls laugh. Being intelligent is a good attribute, but being able to transform your intelligence into a witty conversation is one crucial key to opening up a girl's heart.

Girls love someone who can relate to them and make them feel comfortable. How do they feel comfortable? It is through communication and letting them know you better.

Being too intellectual means becoming too serious about things and it makes girls feel scared/bored and insecure in a way.

Moreover you mentioned that the girl can't measure up to your intellectual ability and you chose to listen. Now, if the girl is always talking and you are not talking much, it will reach a point where she will feel that the both of you have no chemistry.
No matter how strong an attraction she has for you, it will slowly die off.

Maybe you have this impression that guys should always pay for meals, i beg to differ as you are over indulging them and in the end, taken for granted by the girls.
Sometimes girls just need to be treated like dirt before they come to treasure.

Seriously the excuse that girls give is too typical, "you are too nice and you need some luck", "you are too good to be true and you can find other better girls" If it is interpreted by me, it merely means sorry you have not created enough chemistry between us. Better luck finding someone else.

Being able to carry out lame + witty conversations to make girls laugh is not an easy task. It takes lots of practice and most importantly, forsake your serious image and be a clown sometimes.

Hope the above helps.

[Aesthetic]

Originally Posted by indexes401

Hi TS,

There is no right or wrong as everybody's experience is different. You can take my opinion as a reference point.

In the initial stage of courting, Girls usually love guys who can joke and make them laugh.

You got to let lose and try to make the girls laugh. Being intelligent is a good attribute, but being able to transform your intelligence into a witty conversation is one crucial key to opening up a girl's heart.

Girls love someone who can relate to them and make them feel comfortable. How do they feel comfortable? It is through communication and letting them know you better.

Being too intellectual means becoming too serious about things and it makes girls feel scared/bored and insecure in a way.

Moreover you mentioned that the girl can't measure up to your intellectual ability and you chose to listen. Now, if the girl is always talking and you are not talking much, it will reach a point where she will feel that the both of you have no chemistry.
No matter how strong an attraction she has for you, it will slowly die off.

Maybe you have this impression that guys should always pay for meals, i beg to differ as you are over indulging them and in the end, taken for granted by the girls.
Sometimes girls just need to be treated like dirt before they come to treasure.

Seriously the excuse that girls give is too typical, "you are too nice and you need some luck", "you are too good to be true and you can find other better girls" If it is interpreted by me, it merely means sorry you have not created enough chemistry between us. Better luck finding someone else.

Being able to carry out lame + witty conversations to make girls laugh is not an easy task. It takes lots of practice and most importantly, forsake your serious image and be a clown sometimes.

Hope the above helps.

You really hit the nail, and I appreciate the constructive suggestions. What you have mentioned, coincidentally correspond to areas and aspect I think I should be improving on.

On a tangent, is there anyone who is familiar with the job description and training of a Regimental police?

[Greendevil]

TS,u maybe top of score when come to study but that doesnt mean u a human magnet of that sort. From what u written, I think your EQ sucks big time. Thinking you are too intelligent for a girl to even talk to her?!??!?!Well I dont think even any man will want to talk to you needless to say a girl for that arrogance and over confident. Good in yr study doesnt mean u good in everything. Else why the heck there are so many different uni course specialise in different trade , might as well make it a general degree.

Wake up handsome, stop looking down frm the cloud and start to breath some air from down earth.

[Aesthetic]

Originally Posted by Greendevil

TS,u maybe top of score when come to study but that doesnt mean u a human magnet of that sort. From what u written, I think your EQ sucks big time. Thinking you are too intelligent for a girl to even talk to her?!??!?!Well I dont think even any man will want to talk to you needless to say a girl for that arrogance and over confident. Good in yr study doesnt mean u good in everything. Else why the heck there are so many different uni course specialise in different trade , might as well make it a general degree.

Wake up handsome, stop looking down frm the cloud and start to breath some air from down earth.

You're missing the canonical fine points. It would make for lesser misunderstanding if you interpret my post in a greater clarity. I do not think my intellect is anything to boot about.
You are right to say I am severely lack in EQ. I tend to have difficult expressing how I feel; and, as is the case always I care more than what I can express.

Intelligences comes in multiple dimension and there is no single measure from which it can be quantified. All I'm saying is that because she isn't intellectually inclined, I find it difficult to talk to her regarding certain aspect of interest, and by the same parity, because she tends to be a fun-loving person whose life revolves around her friends, families, social circle et al, she finds difficult relating to me. I am attracted to the qualities she possesses that which I do not. Frankly, I have little concerns as to whether or not my date is intelligent. My appetite for intellectual engagement can be fulfilled elsewhere.

And that brings me to this thread on seeking advises as to how I can improve my dating skills with the opposite gender.

[alan0338]

TS, all ur posts are so serious one leh... seriously do u know how to talk cock, joke or even flirt ? always so serious, dun say average jane will siam u la, even ugly gals will find u boring sometimes dun be so serious the gals will find u more yummy

[Aesthetic]

Originally Posted by alan0338

TS, all ur posts are so serious one leh... seriously do u know how to talk cock, joke or even flirt ? always so serious, dun say average jane will siam u la, even ugly gals will find u boring sometimes dun be so serious the gals will find u more yummy

Dam it I know; in fact, I joke among my male friends. It so happened that I write in such a manner.

[HCKing]

Originally Posted by Aesthetic

I happened to date only average Jane but with lack of success.

y not start dating below average Jane, yr luck may lies there. and if u r lucky to secure one to be your girl you will get to learn alot thru real BGR experience. well thats hw i learnt when i was a teen, having entered into relationships with diff fat and ugly girls. most of them r easy to sian, even more so for yr case since u mentioned u r physically attractive and intelligent. no doubt they r all short term affairs i did learn quite alot from them thru the many criticisms and expectations thrown at me by them girls during the relationships.

and like what other bros have said, try to be someone fun and interesting when it comes to dating. crack some stupid jokes if u must to make them laugh. too much silence is not good as it will create a negative impression and the guy will be labelled as the 'easily forgettable' or 可有可无 type.

[Satire]

Dear TS,

You come across as a little too arrogant and defensive. Perhaps you would like to reconsider your stance? Maybe lower your guard a bit, and let loose and be silly... there's no point in reading too much into things, as anyway life is complex enough already, so why add more confusion? By the way, there are plenty of girls out there who I believe can measure up to your intellectual capacities, but just maybe you haven't found one whom you're able to click with. FYI, silence denotes uninterest, so perhaps you should ask the right questions when on a date...

Hopefully my female PoV helps here

[GDX11]

I have friends who are able to converse and articulate well in front of fellow buddies but always lose themselves when they interact with girls. You might want to heed HCKing's advice of dating different girls so as to improve your communication with the opposite gender.

If you are feeling confident and comfortable to speak, you'll eventually be more forthcoming and funny (I hope). Treating them nice is a gentleman gesture but excessive can be deemed as putting the girl up the pedestal. Treat them well, try to be comfortable and be yourself. That's often the best way to establish meaningful and pleasant interactions.

[goodpartner]

Originally Posted by Aesthetic

Dam it I know; in fact, I joke among my male friends. It so happened that I write in such a manner.

Bro, how's your army days? Not in camp today?

If the bros here can just have one meeting with you, we'll be able to tell you what's possibly wrong with your "always rejected" - at least I think I can tell.

So far the only feedback is that "you need more luck"? With so many failures, why have you not ask for specifics from those who "rejected" you? That's the only way you can solve the mystery and learn from mistakes.

I'm sure if you're "always" rejected, that means the problem lies with you. Hard for bros here to diagnose and analyze without more field intel

[EtherC]

TS, do yourself a favor and go take a Myer-Briggs test. It might tell you more about your desirable and non desirable traits. Be aware that eligibility is kinda like currency. Its a perceived value. If majority of the girls find you difficult to communicate with after spending some time with you, your eligibility will be down in the dumps.

End of the day,not many people would want to spend their time with someone who makes them feel inadequate. Be mindful of the image you project to others. Body language is important, do you appear bored and distant to the girls you dated? Conversations are a 2 way thingy you need to participate but talk about simple mundane stuff eg trips, movies. Crack a joke or two, do not appear to be high & mighty. Perhaps a female friend can advise you on this aspect. It's important to relate and display empathy ie to bridge a connection on a psychological level.

Just a suggestion, relationships are for people to enjoy each other's company. It doesn't have to be a score table. There's no pass/fail/distinction. It either works or it doesn't. Don't over analyse its more important to enjoy each other and the activity you're involved with. Be real , relaxed and sincere. It's a person, not a puzzle to be solved.

Do cheer up, you're still young and there are plenty of chances around. EQ is something one develops over time. Just meet more people and do not shy away from clubbing. It does help with socialising if you can drink.

[Satire]

@EtherC : This might be OT but ... Myer-Briggs test recommendation!

You've got me slightly amused. (In a good way)